THIS FAT OLD LADY HAS A BOO-BOO HEEL

You know that dry skin you get around your heel? Here’s a piece of advice. Don’t fuck with it. I was bored and peeled some off. It started to bleed. I went wandering around a science fiction convention wearing sandals. My heel now hurts like a bitch and God only knows what crawled into it…

WHAT DID THIS FAT OLD LADY EAT?

Weird, weird, dream. I was at work. A mix of the offices I worked at in LA and the old/new offices of the firm I currently work for. The offices were being redecorated. Everything was a mess, I couldn’t find where they were hiding files. But the most amazing part was the offices of the…

THIS FAT OLD LADY’S CRAPPY DAY – PART 2 – WORK

The attorneys all arose from their weekend with a frenzy of work they all needed done NOW. First up, a partner, who had sent me a scan after closing on Friday of a huge flipping lease – 22 sheets, but it’s double-sided so it is 44 pages of work. No problem. Only, the partner decided…

GLAD TO BE A TALL FAT OLD LADY

I know I just bitched and moaned about how being just a bit taller than average is a pain in the ass; but our trip to Bellevue showed me how those extra inches can be a blessing. The bed in our hotel room was so fucking high! Sitting on the edge, my feet did not…

OH WHERE OH WHERE HAS THIS FAT LADY BEEN

I’ve been in Bellevue, Washington. My husband was attending an ASME (American Society of Mechanical Engineers) conference, and I tagged along. As usual, the weather in the Seattle area was gorgeous. All the locals told me that this weather is not usual. Uh-huh. That is what they always say, and yet, every time I have…

THIS FAT OLD LADY PACKS IT UP

Getting ready for a trip. One of my least favorite things to do. Especially when we’re flying. When we’re driving, I can bring anything that will fit in the car, whether I’ll need it or not. So now the fun begins. What do I need to bring? What do I want to bring? What will…

SAGGY FAT OLD LADY BOOBIES

I don’t like wearing bras much. However, not wearing a bra is going to be uncomfortable for me (and probably others, but fuck them). I got big old saggy fat lady boobies. Sad to say, I have always had big old saggy fat lady boobies – even as a sweet young thing (as the picture…