Here she is folks! All set for Halloween. My latest Dikke Dame (Fat Lady) doll. A fat witch. She is a lot like the one I made for my darling cousin Alice, but a little bit different. No cape – instead, she has long sleeves, a frilly contrasting underskirt (purple petticoat with black frill) and…
Growing up, my step-father always chose my (used) cars. He’d tell me how much, I’d pay, and I’d have a new-to-me car to drive. This was not always a successful endeavor – one car had the engine blow up about a week after I got it. But Charlie went back and got me a different…
Yesterday for lunch, I made myself some nachos – fat old lady from Michigan style – corn tortilla chips, Mexican blend cheese and Pace (mild) salsa. Nothing exciting. When I was almost done, suddenly, with no warning, my body decided to tell me my luncheon choice was not acceptable. I knew I was about to…
Side Show is a wonderful musical that is almost never done. Unlike most musicals, the themes are dark and it does not have a happy ending. It is the story about the rise to fame of conjoined twins Daisy and Violet Hilton and their personal unhappiness. It is a story about prejudice. It is a…
If someone is trying not to fart in front of you but one slips out – DO NOT SAY OR DO ANYTHING THAT WILL MAKE THE FARTER LAUGH. Because once you start laughing, all the farts in waiting are going to be set free. Clearly there is a direct connection between your laughing mechanism and…
Many of my non-fat friends (and some of my fat friends) have never heard of the HAES® (Health at Every Size) approach to healthcare. It is an important concept – a concept of treating the patient in an environment of weight neutrality. It is a concept (as I understand it) of trying to help the…
It’s true! Okay, maybe just Laverne, because I think this was after Shirley left the show. I “celebrated” turning 30 by having my gallbladder removed, just before my birthday. Because I was fair and fat (although not yet forty, which according to the doctor, is supposed to be the gallbladder stone trifecta), the doctor assumed…
I had to buy a new office chair. A bolt in the arm of my old one broke clean off! It broke clean off with part of the bolt still firmly screwed into the seat of the chair. Well, shit. And worst of all, it was the arm that has my mouse pad attached to…
I had an audition on Friday. It went pretty well, and I was hoping for an e-mail inviting me to call backs. For some reason, it never occurred to me that they might telephone. My cell phone rings. I don’t recognize the number. Must be a telemarketer. I HATE telemarketer calls. I REALLY HATE telemarketer…
I have not been in the mood to do much in the way of cooking for a while. But last night I got a wild hair and decided to actually cook something for dinner. (I know alert the media.) Up until maybe a month or so ago, I had never heard of Hasselback Potatoes. Then,…
Thoughts from a Fat Old Lady 