THIS FAT OLD LADY GETS HER MAD ON

Several times a year, we journey to Los Angeles to spend time with my sister Karon, Karon’s husband Bill, and their two boys. Karon and her men live in a corporate housing complex known as Oakwood. Oakwood is a great place to live – especially for the boys. Two swimming pools, tennis courts, basketball courts,…

THIS FAT OLD LADY TALKS SOME CHRISTMAS

Tis the season for people to bemoan a “war” on Christmas. I am so tired of this. There is no war on Christmas – nobody is trying to keep you from celebrating however you choose. We are merely asking that you not expect or demand that everyone celebrate in a manner predicated on your personal…

THIS FAT OLD LADY HAS A GOOD BODY

I’m sure I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating. Every body is a good body. It’s true. Even if parts of your body don’t work as well as you would wish, or as well as they used to, every day your body does amazing things. Take an anatomy class, you’ll be blown away to…

THIS FAT OLD LADY HATES THE ITSY BITSY SPIDER

  The itsy bitsy spider was in my bed last night He wandered down my leg and took more than one bite. Now the itsy bitsy spider is underneath my bed And if the cats would do their job that fucker would be dead.   I’m allergic to spider bites (in fact most insect bites),…

AM I THE MEANEST FAT OLD LADY EVER?

I sometimes wonder about myself. Here’s something that happened years ago that made me laugh then and makes me laugh now. I’m at the LA zoo. There is a child sitting and swinging back and forth on a heavy chain link fence that is part of the barrier around a cactus garden. There are signs…