When I was a wee one (yes, I was actually wee – once – a very long time ago), my folks would bundle me in a snow suit and we’d go ice skating. My first skates were double bladed and I loved skating. Nobody told me that I would one day have to forsake my…
I grew up in Michigan. This meant that you never knew what kind of weather you were going to get for Halloween – clear and nippy, clear and freezing, rain, snow, you name it, Michigan has it. Therefore, you had to plan for an all-weather Halloween costume. Because no matter the weather, by God, you…
In high school, I was in the National Honor Society. I don’t remember when you were allowed to join, but I think it was Junior and Senior year – I may be hallucinating this though – it may have started in Sophomore year – but I don’t think so. You had to be nominated and…
For some reason, I’ve been thinking of my first apartment lately. It was awful, but I was so proud to have a place of my own. In an old house that had been divided into 4 apartments – mine was a 1 bedroom on the first floor, right off a freeway and in a somewhat…
My first job-job was at a fat lady clothing store called Nancy’s Place. I say, my first “job-job” because before that I had made some TV commercials for Nancy’s Place, but I was paid in clothing, not $$$. Which was fine with me, because I wanted clothes more than I wanted $$$. When Nancy’s Place…
One thing many people in Michigan grow up doing is playing games – in particular card games. Maybe it’s the long cold winters that has instilled this love of sitting down with a deck of cards. That’s as good of an excuse as any, I suppose. Fuck if I know. My Grandma taught me Canasta,…
We all have those moments where we have a choice to make, and looking back, you realize how impactful it was on where your life ended up. One of mine was a job I got through the Michigan unemployment office. I had been laid off (because I took off a summer to do the Fischer…
Everyone should have a person in their life who loves them no matter what and is always there for them. For me, that was my Grandma Harris. God I loved her, and I still do to this day. My Grandma Cotter died when I was about 7 or so, and she was very ill before…
Growing up, my step-father always chose my (used) cars. He’d tell me how much, I’d pay, and I’d have a new-to-me car to drive. This was not always a successful endeavor – one car had the engine blow up about a week after I got it. But Charlie went back and got me a different…
It’s true! Okay, maybe just Laverne, because I think this was after Shirley left the show. I “celebrated” turning 30 by having my gallbladder removed, just before my birthday. Because I was fair and fat (although not yet forty, which according to the doctor, is supposed to be the gallbladder stone trifecta), the doctor assumed…
Thoughts from a Fat Old Lady 