When we moved into this neighborhood, we were told that there were never any trick-or-treaters on Halloween.
Okay. A teensy bit disappointing, but we were living in a community in San Jose (the 10th largest city in the United States), and we never had trick-or-treaters. So, we can deal.
Then we learned that on a (convenient to the participants) weekend before Halloween, all the neighbors gather together all the kiddos in their lives and they come around and trick-or-treat; and then after they close off a part of the loop and we have a block party.
At first I thought, maybe we should get full sized candy bars for these kids.
Then I found out there will be around 50 (if not more) of the little ankle biters.
That’s like a horde. I just hope nobody gives them torches and pitchforks!
What do you call a group of candy begging children? A terror of toddlers? A beastly and ghastly of boys and girls? A charnel of children? An abomination of adolescents? A Kafaaesque of kiddos?
And fuck them. They’re getting fun bars.
2 thoughts on “THIS FAT OLD LADY’S ME MONDAY – GOING TO BE AN EARLY HALLOWEEN”
“An abomination of adolescents”? BRILLIANT! Think you’d appreciate the comment by the
late Florence King in her column, “The Misanthrope’s Corner”, regarding child molesters:
“I’ve never understood child molesters. In order to be a molesting pervert, you have to be
willing to be ALONE in a room with a child!”
May I suggest a clutch of candy chompers? Have fun with it all….and I NEED one of those
Clutch of candy chompers is a great one!