No.  I don’t mean ads about Yahoo.  I mean the ads that appear at the top of the Yahoo Home Page.

Mother of God.

You see a little tag at the upper-right corner that says “Close Ad.”

At least you do if it is not an Apple ad.  Apple products don’t care.  You are fucked.  You cannot get out of having those ads going.  I don’t know why Apple would think having an uncloseable ad would enamor the Yahoo using public to them; but that seems to be their thought process.

Anyhow, if it’s not an Apple ad, at the upper-right corner you’ll see the “Close Ad” tag.

How exciting!  How convenient.  Thank you.  You realize that giving people the option to close the ad might make for a happier consumer.

Careful.  Don’t be getting to excited.  They are tricksy.

If you approach the Close Ad tag from the right, just as you go to click on it, it turns into “AdChoices” and will take you to a whole other window to have a serious discussion with you about Yahoo and ads.  Well, isn’t that just what somebody trying to hit the Close Ad tag wants – more stuff about ads.

The secret is, and nobody will tell you this (except this fat old lady), approach the tag from the left and you can click on it without it turning into AdChoices.

Oh, and it used to be, when you went to Yahoo (as your home page), you closed the ad once.  You were then free to peruse news stories, and other Yahoo apps, and unless you actually exited Yahoo.  They had the courtesy to believe that you had no interest in seeing that ad again.  Now, every time you leave the home page, guess what?  (Did you guess?)

The fucking ad is back and you have to try to close it again (remember from the left!).

Because just because you closed the ad once, you probably didn’t mean to do that, right?  It does it when you come back to the home page after looking at any of the news items and articles.  It even comes back if you accidentally end up clicking on AdChoices.

Mamma, Mamma, make it stop.

Advertisers and Yahoo, please listen up.  We understand that you have a need to make money.  It’s okay.  Most of us like money too.  However, you can’t make us buy stuff by cramming your advertising down our fucking throats.  You will not endear yourself to us by obsessively stalking us.

And Apple.  I had no opinion about you one way or the other before.  Now I fucking hate you.  You can go thank your marketing people.