First, who is the sick fuck who put pieces of six habanero peppers in the woodchips of a school playground in Lakewood, Colorado?

Second, seriously, this led to the evacuation of the school? Locking down the school would not be sufficient to keep the kids safe from habanero peppers? Makes you wonder how effective a lock down is. I mean, what if you’re up against something that can actually move?

And third, what kind of insane people ingest these things? Anything that you should not handle with your bare hands, is not something that should be going inside your body. Your skin is relatively tough and pretty good at protecting the gushy stuff that’s inside of you. If your skin can’t take it, your mucous membrane is not going to be happy about coming in contact with it.

I hope the kids are okay. I hope they catch the sick fuck. And I hope we soon see the end of the craze of trying to see just how spicy-hot you can go before it kills you.

Nobody’s impressed, okay? Or if they are, they really aren’t the kind of people you want to impress.