Remember when you used to get hearing tests at school?  They stressed me out so much. 

I was stressed because I didn’t know my left from my right and I was sure they were going to ask me to use those identifiers during the test. 

The reason I didn’t know my left from my right was because when they taught it to us in first grade, smarty mcfarty me realized that all I had to do was wait for the person opposite me to raise their hand or reach out to shake and I should use raise or reach with the hand on the other side. 

I thought I was so smart figuring this out.

Yup.  So smart, that I ended up not knowing my left from my right.

Have to say that little trick took a firm bite out of my fat little girl hinder.

So.  We were having hearing tests.  I knew I couldn’t right L and R on my hands – because the adult administering the test would notice and my secret would be out. 

What’s a girl to do?

Write L and R on her shoes, obviously. 

It’s a hearing test, nobody is going to be looking at my feet! 

And I was right!  The adult did not notice the big L and R on the top of my shoes. 

Also, it didn’t matter, because they just asked me to raise my hand on the side I heard the sound. 

All that worry and genius wasted.

And why this trip down memory lane?  I went to the Kaiser audiology department today; and I’m happy to report that at no time during the whole battery of tests nobody asked me to tell my right from my left (still an iffy proposition for me). 

Also, guess who needs a hearing aid?

The whole process of getting fitted for a hearing aid and having it “tuned in” takes numerous appointments; and to tell the truth, I’m about doctored out right now.  So I’ll deal with it later.

In the meantime, I’ll thank you to SPEAK UP!