My darling husband decided we needed to upgrade our cable equipment.  He wasn’t wrong.  Our equipment is very old (and yes, this is true of us personally as well as the cable company equipment – but cable company upgrades to equipment are free).

So he unhooked everything, and I took my silly ass down to Comcast/Xfinity to trade it in for the latest and greatest.  They told me that I could just plug in the new equipment and everything would be ready to go.

What a bunch of fucking liars!

And how stupid do I feel for believing them?

First, the cable TV isn’t working right.  We can’t get On Demand shows, which we use a lot (catching up on TV shows that we would rather watch on our own schedule).  So I get online with the cable company, doing an online chat.  They had to a reboot of the system.  Okay.  So now the TV is working.

Then husband hooks up the new modem/router (which we were assured was necessary because the old modem/router would make things crash with the new system).  Now we have no computer!  Can’t get online for this one – because, no computer!  So I telephone.  They have to send a reboot/activation signal.  But we once again have computer and wireless.

But guess what?  We now have no telephone!

Fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuck.

But I have computer, so back to the online chat.

They send every kind of signal they can think of – and – nothing.  Nothing works.

So now I have to have a technician come to the house.  Luckily, they were able to send one out the next day (Sunday) in the late afternoon.  (Maybe I was lucky, or maybe by then Comcast/Xfinity just felt it was not safe to fuck with this fat old lady any further.  Good choice Comcast/Xfinity.)

And the technician shows up on time!  Yay Conner the technician.

It takes him a while, but he finally gets it running and we have phone.

Then he asks me if I want to check the internet.

WTF?

I do, and it’s working.

Exit Conner.

Go to use the internet, it’s not working.  On Demand stops working.

And then magically, the stars align, and it all starts to work again.

Oh, and next week, we are getting Comcast/Xfinity home security service hooked up (not that we need it, but it reduces our overall bill by a few hundred dollars a year for 2 years).

Gods help us.