Every week this fat old lady dutifully walks into the offices of my hematologist/oncologist and offers up her fat old lady arm so they can take a tube of blood; run it over to the lab across the hall. They are kind enough to let me wait for a print out of the results. The main thing they are looking for is the status of my platelets; but as long as they’ve got it – they run a full CBC (complete blood count) report on me.
This week, my platelets dropped 10 whole points.
Fuck.
To try and fend off the slow, but almost continuous drop in my platelet count; I have been prescribed Promacta.
Promacta is a drug that is supposed to encourage your body to produce more platelets. It is kind of sort of working in that my platelet count isn’t dropping as quickly as it might otherwise.
Yay?
But, of course, Promacta also has a pile of side effects.
For instance, it can make your nose turn into a literal snot fountain. No congestion, just clear, thin snot constantly threatening to just fall out of my nose. I didn’t realize this was why I had a snot fountain on the front of my face until my primary physician checked and, yup, there it is one of the main side effects.
Lovely.
And Promacta, when combined with my statin, can make your skin incredibly itchy. No, I do not have high cholesterol (even though I swear every doctor who sees that I take a statin and looks at my fat old lady body automatically puts in my chart that I have high cholesterol – and then the battle begins as I try to get it removed because if they would simply look at my bloodwork, my cholesterol levels are amazingly low) but because heart disease runs (rampant) in my family. So I now have really itchy skin (despite slathering on the Cerave moisturizer) that I can only sometimes leave unitched when in public (at home, I indulge in itch-fests to my heart’s (and skin’s) content.)
Great.
And Promacta can make cataracts worse. I’ve been worried about this one. I know I have cataracts, but only at the “we’ll see what happens because they don’t require any treatment now” level. Today I had my annual eye exam. Guess what?
Did you guess that I now need cataract surgery in both eyes because for some reason my cataracts have gotten a whole lot worse. For some reason …
I know every drug comes with side effects and it’s all a matter of trade-offs; but fuck me … Today has just been a day.
It’s a piece of cake, so I’m told …
Thoughts from a Fat Old Lady 
Oy – Tante Teri, what a shitty start to the year! I was thrilled to hear about the offer you had to sing – wow – big band! My mom & godmother did those gigs in the ’40s, and I, too, wish I could get up there on that bandstand & sing the great songs. Now – about Aunt Eller: I did it back in ’69 (or maybe ’70?) for Long Beach Civic Light Opera – fun part to do, but like you I don’t think I could stump across the stage now. Just got out of a 10-day hospital stay (flu – proves that no matter the shots, diet, vitamins, you can STILL get frighteningly sick) & am sitting here attached to an oxygen tank. It’s sunny & about 65 degrees in L.A. & I’m too tethered t get out. At least I can look at it. I DO envy you your still-performing status. There’s nothing like getting up there on the stage & belting one out.
All of this will go away…and we’ll keep getting older. Only weird thing: the hospital kept feeding me, insisting I eat 3 meals a day (Kaiser in Hollywood. Many members are Hispanic so they serve really nice, fresh Mexican food) & whatever was in the food took about 5 pounds off me. Go figure. SO, dear Tante Teri, just keep pushin’ our old bones forward…or sideways…or whatever..until the bluebird shows p in the spring, or wahtever it is that you Michiganers take as a sign that the seasons are changing. Hang in!
Oh no. I’m so sorry you got hit so hard with the flu. It is really hitting hard here in Michigan but so far (knock on wood) we haven’t gotten it. That’s one thing I miss from California – good fresh Mexican food. We have a pretty good little restaurant near us – Maria’s. Very simple, but most of the food is great. For some reason, though, we can’t find any Mexican restaurants that can do a good red sauce. The verde is great, but the red – not so good. I also miss Kaiser – where everything is under one roof. I get so tired trying to keep my various doctors up to date on my whole health picture. Two days after I decided not to audition, I got a DM from the musical director (I’ve known him since he was in Junior High); saying they hadn’t gotten any Aunt Ellers and would I be interested … and then he said, as soon as he started typing the message, they got a lady in for auditions who could do the part. I thanked him profusely for thinking of me, explained why I didn’t audition, and told him to give me a holler if his Aunt Eller didn’t work out. I am enjoying what I figure will be my last few ventures in theater because you never know when it’s all over and you just can’t anymore. But, as long as we’re on the right side of the grass, never say never! Hope you are untethered and free to roam about again soon. Practice medicine, not stereotypes. (Ragen Chastain)
Oh Dear, this is way too many issues. That statin / cholesterol – I can relate. The cataract surgery is easy. I swear. Pamela