I am the queen of lists.
I make lists for everything – and some of them, I even use.
I just live by the idea that if it is written down, I don’t have to worry about forgetting about it.
Sadly, that’s only partially true.
After it’s written down, I have to remember to check the list.
That’s mainly where the system falls apart.
Also, making lists creates all this pressure on me, with all the “you need to”, “you have to”, “you should”, that lists imply.
I used to get great pleasure from crossing things off of my list.
But now my lists are on the computer; and simply deleting an item is not as satisfying as crossing things off my list; nor is using strikeout.
But I finally thought of a list that is helpful.
It came to me during one of my CBT sessions.
I now have a list: “What Have I Accomplished Today”
When I am feeling useless and down on myself – I can always look at that list, and say to myself, “See you accomplished something today.” Sometimes, it’s even a whole bunch of somethings.
And that helps.
Especially when I think of people who are having a more difficult struggle with depression and anxiety. People who can barely get out of bed or take a shower.
I look at my list, and I have something tangible that tells me that I am not doing so bad.