THIS FAT OLD LADY IS IN THE TOILET – LITERALLY

spoon in toilet

Why didn’t I think of this?

 

We’re just home from our nice holiday trip to Los Angeles.  I even write a blog extolling the joys of coming home.

Last night, at about 11:30 p.m., I’m getting ready to go to bed and …..

The toilet breaks.

Fuck.

Now, this might not be such a big deal except, I have one of those shelving units over my toilet.  So to get to the tank (where something is obviously wrong), I have to unload those shelves and move the whole unit.

You may think I’m kind of stupid for having a shelving unit there; but (a) we have very little storage space in our tiny home; and (b) the shelving unit is a VAST improvement over what used to be there – a cement and tile shelf.

Yes, whoever designed this house, built a shelf immediately above the toilet tank.  You could get the lid to the tank off – just – but forget about seeing into the tank or replacing anything in the tank.  After years of putting up with this situation, I finally took a hacksaw and a hammer to the shelf and destroyed it (while saving edging tile to finish off the edge of the sink counter, so it didn’t look weird where I broke off the shelf).

So while moving the shelving unit is a hassle, I know full well it could be worse – a LOT worse.

Needless to say, at 11:30 pm, I am not about to do anything about this situation; especially, since we have a 2nd bathroom.

But this morning, I get my butch-cookie on, move the shelving unit, look and determine the tank lever is broken (totally off) and head to Home Depot.

Where would they hide the toilet repair kits?

Hmmmmmm?

In the bath aisle?

No.

In the plumbing aisle?

No.

Turns out, it is at the very end of aisle 14 – the flooring aisle.

Well d’uh.

I also picked up a new toilet seat because mine has been broken for some time (duct tape can fix ANYTHING), and since I was there anyhow …

Got home, and FIXED it.

Ta-dah!

I even cleared out a bunch of old hair gel and cosmetics and stuff that had accumulated on the shelves before putting that back.  (My encore ta dah!)

I haven’t put the new toilet seat on because the old one is apparently meant to be there FOREVER.  I have to go get the Phillip’s head screwdriver to remove it and it looks like that will be a whole other adventure (and probable blog post about how I can screw up changing a toilet seat!)

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