THE FAT OLD LADY VS. SUPER GLUE (AGAIN)

 

 

When will I ever, ever learn?

Not yet, apparently.

I like to have fun eyeglass frames. So I buy my eyeglass frames from various sources (I have some darling clear pink and glitter frames I got at the Dollar Tree); and then when it is time for a new prescription, I give the frames to my eye doctor and have the prescriptions put into those frames. Saves me some money, and I have some relatively unique glasses.

However, the doctor often warns me that I may encounter problems with these less-than-standard frames. Not a problem – up until recently.

I had these great frames – Woodies – yes, made of wood; and the eye doctor told me they might crack while putting the lenses in. But they came back just fine; or so I thought.

Then the lens pops out. Of course this happens while we are on vacation. Shit.

I can get the lens back in but it doesn’t stay put well. So off hubby and I go to the local Dollar Tree and buy some super glue.

Back to the hotel, and I get ready to glue my glasses – not realizing that super-gluing your lens in your glasses would probably work better if you are wearing glasses, which I can’t because I’m busy super-gluing my glasses so I can have glasses to see.

You know this is not going to end well, don’t you?

I find that not only is the lens out but the frame has actually cracked. Shit. But no worries, I have my super glue! And I proceed to glue the lens into the frame and glue the crack in the frame. Being VERY careful.

This is where I never learn. No matter how careful you are with super glue, it is going to go places you do not want it to go. This time it got on my fingers and on the lens of my glasses. Double shit. So I know have glasses that will hold together (if the adds are accurate, a grown man should be able to hang from my glasses now).

I also have opaque smears of super glue on my lenses (after I have ripped my fingers free from the glasses). Wiping these smears was a bad idea – as I learned after the attempt – and just gave me bigger smears. I know that nail polish remover will remove super glue – what I don’t know is whether nail polish remover will melt my plastic lenses.

My cousin happened to have some nail polish remover and it worked – reasonably well. I could now at least see out of the lens – although there was still quite a bit of smearage – it was off to the bottom side in peripheral vision land – so the glasses were usable.

My hubby went on a business trip and came home with something called “Diamond Wipes” (wet nap nail polish removers) from the hotel he stayed at (again, Hyatt Regency to the rescue), and those little fuckers worked like a charm. There is still a little bit of super glue residue around the edge of the lens, but otherwise, they are just fine.

So hopefully my lesson is learned. Super Glue is not my friend – and I need to stock up on Diamond Wipes in case I ever venture into Super Glue land again.

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